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RPM 2021 - Neat / Cozy

by Apraxia

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1.
You and Me 03:59
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Dear God I hope nothing is wrong Been a while since I spoke to you I know Did a few things I’d rather not have done As limited as a primitive analog You and me and everyone I know Believes in something wrong, I think we’re stuck Inside a dream - a forest made of plastic trees Distinctive shapes misleading me What’s the point of anything at all If it hurts to be awake and witness everything Help me help me to forget my thoughts I’ll be better next time if you want You and me and everyone I know Believes in something wrong, I think we’re stuck Inside a dream - a forest made of plastic trees Distinctive shapes misleading me Start reforming Neural networks in the spheres Say goodbye Disproportionate Feelings taint the way it heals And how you react to it now Tired of restarting The game was not so hard for you Easy is as easy does Shifting onward Into something I can’t feel
2.
Still Around 03:19
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I broke things again Why bother fixing what’s broken within But you’re still around Knowing what’s coming you still don’t get out But Here I go... Falling in The same pits again You keep pulling me out But I’m still about to just fall right in To trouble again. But you still pull me out When I’m just about to give in Maybe it’s time To see sense for once and just leave me behind I can’t seem to win I‘m trying so hard to be worthy again But Here I go... Here I go again.... You’re pulling me through. Depending on you but then Here I go again. And you’re still around But here I go. Here I go. Here I go... Falling in The same pits again You keep pulling me out But I’m still about to just fall right in To trouble again. But you still pull me out When I’m just still bound to keep Falling in The same pits again You keep pulling me out But I’m still about to just fall right in To trouble again. But you still pull me out When I’m just about to give in I’m just about to give in
3.
Waiting 03:37
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Lay down your hands and ego I’d say you’ve earned a minute’s rest You conquered the world, forget it Cause I know I know your soul is wearing The consequence of years of violence and war Waiting is the hardest part When you know the hit is coming up Brace for it, you might tense up Before you know it the round is done Pick up those dusty medals You know you’ve got a few miles left You conquered the road, forget it Oh I know I know your bones are wearing The consequence of taking on giants Waiting is the hardest part When you know the hit is coming up Brace for it, you might tense up Before you know it the round is done Waiting is the hardest part When you know the hit is coming up If you get another shot Will you take it or pass it up?
4.
So Afraid 03:42
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I couldn’t find a way, to tell you all the things I meant to tell you yesterday I try so hard to say, the words that stay inside and never see the light of day (Caught up. Caught in. Caught up. Caught in a scene) Caught in a scene, that plays every day It plays on repeat. Repeat. You smile and turn away, thinking about the things you bit your tongue to stop from saying You’re holding back again. And no one knows but you about the life that you pretend. (Caught up. Caught in. Caught up. Caught in a scene) Caught in a scene, that plays every day It plays on repeat. Repeat. So afraid. We fall in line and all the time we lie So afraid. We try to hide and try to find a life. Caught in a scene, that plays every day It plays on repeat. Repeat. Caught in a scene, that plays every day It plays on repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat
5.
Blink 04:26
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I don’t want your secrets now don’t you dare share your story, no, oh no I got enough in my head to wind me up forever I’m sorry Won’t you stay mysterious and clever that’ll be the boundary Between love and therapy, ignorance is pleasant for all of me Can I rest in this moment Just toss my thoughts around Can I feel at any moment What it’s like trapped inside you Maybe new perspective will allow you to see what’s really going on now I don’t try to hide it but the routine’s inspired by tired eyes In tandem we escape the world and all of the guilt that’s in it Levitating far above the earth if you blink you’ll surely miss it Steam settles in a fragrant plume Ritualistic time for you Sitting there in an empty room The scent will drift The space will bloom No I don’t wanna see you go But I can’t have it end like the last time Don’t you want to turn me off? I don’t want you to feel this One day will be here in no time One way means leave before I unwind Don’t tell it as it is Just say it like it’s Not a fake apology That you rehearsed and loaded Won’t you turn me off I don’t want you to feel this All my starts are endings No more parts between them to blink
6.
There 03:57
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He seems so lost He wanders night and day It seems so far Where will he find the way There........ He’ll find it there........ She’s in that place Hate keeps her all alone She feels the shame Where can she find a home There...... She’ll have it there...... It’s just over there...... They’ll find it there...... You know the pain. You’ve felt the shame. Help bring them the things they’ve been longing for. You feel the doubt. Can’t leave it now. They’re not alone. You see the fall. They struggle and stumble and lose it all. You stay and then, you’re telling them You’ll find it there. You’ll have it there. There.... It’s over there... There... I promise it’s there....
7.
Indigo 04:00
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Broke and tired dreaming of a home Some warmth to save her from the cold Too many nights out there alone She feels them lingering Burn that body They preach with rhythmic clarity She’s not gonna give up Just leave her out there shivering That’s too bad there’s a protest incubating That’s so sad there’s inequality We don’t know Why she’s so Many shades but blue When she glows Indigo She turns into a mute Yet she still sells the truth Lost and distant from the other drones Extensions of the status quo They lead each other to the throne Kings and queens of the obvious Burn that body They preach with rhythmic clarity She’s not gonna give up Just leave her out there shivering That’s too bad there’s a protest incubating That’s so sad there’s inequality We don’t know Why she’s so Many shades but blue When she glows Indigo She turns into a mute Yet still, oh she still Sells it
8.
Turned (ft. Brennan Frederick) 05:09
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Running around and laugh and feel the sun against my face Nights spent on our backs watching stars that stay in place Throwing stones and jumping in the water in my jeans Fishing while our clothes drip dry discussing movie scenes Can’t remember when it changed or when I fell asleep It all turned and time burns It turned lost in all the days Counting down the time I have to wonder why It turned. Now it slips away and I’m trying to find the time to live again Days crawl on until they’re gone and colors fade to gray Faces come and faces go my friends all fade away When did all the time I have start running back instead It all turned and time burns It turned lost in all the days Counting down the time I have to wonder why It turned. Now it slips away and I’m trying to find the time to live again I turn facing all the days Counting all the time I have to feel alive I turn. Fall back into place Think I finally found a way to live again
9.
Subjection 05:41
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Look around, so many tilted Thinning phantoms on an absent planet Somewhere out there floating past the sky An ancient source that makes up all the light Let’s write about its darkest spaces I’ll show you how to fake creation For a price I’ll show you grand designs The reason for this and the next life Is fading Green and blue Time to choose Which of you Is really you I don’t doubt It’s a mirage There’s no proof Infiniteless loops Swallow that extra vintage Walk the path, pursue an abstract landing They’ll gather here to seek forgiveness They want, they want To process what they love Fading Green and blue Time to choose Which of you Is really you I don’t doubt It’s a mirage There’s no proof Infiniteless loops, loops, loops, loops There is no glory Is that something I should feel? Becoming a new story Self righteous spinning wheels The weather never changes When you’re stuck inside of here The air thin and painless Don’t cry, this isn’t real There is no glory Is that something I should feel? Reminiscing on your journey As you pretend it’s something real Up and around The same sights, the same sounds Longing for more Excess habits, sexist words Where does it end? When did the subjection begin? Lights flicker on And then off and on again
10.
Just Visiting 04:51
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Old entries scribbled neatly On a faded yellow pad Don’t seem to make much sense now In my semi-made up bed Whatever purpose they had Guess it’s stayin’ in the past Cause I don’t feel like unwrapping All the garbage in my head Grown ups acting like they’re kids Who’s left here to punish them? Don’t worry, It’ll be fine If you can smile and laugh Grown ups screaming, throwin’ fits Shut up and hear this argument All you gotta do Is say it like its true Wondering about times lost Memories fused into the stacks of folded paper Black and blue ink blots With dates and printed labels Different sizes and shapes Wrinkled up recycled letters Damn I used to be so fake Grown ups acting like they’re kids Who’s left here to punish them? Don’t worry, It’ll be fine If you can smile and laugh Grown ups screaming, throwin’ fits Shut up and hear this argument All you gotta do Is say it like its true Let’s get down act like we’re hip Drink too much, get a little lit We can stay up late Who cares about responsibility I’m not here to be something else Just pretending ‘til I get blacked out again I’m not here to be unkind Just visiting in a story that I won’t remember I’m not sure I’ve had enough wine Or if I can walk a straight enough line I’m not here to be someone else Just witnessing whatever, oh well I’m not sure I can unwind Inching to the finish of this never-ending night I’m not sure if I’ve had too much wine Or if I can walk a straight enough line
11.
Everywhere I Go 04:18
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I must have been here I must have played this scene before Waiting for the sirens Waiting for a mystery to solve Post-incidental violence There’ll be a record somewhere soon But for now we’ll play like We’re witnessing something new Rubbernecker’s dream yeah Cars trashed to pieces in the road Don’t you want to see it? Biggest crash since 1981 I don’t want to go home Wanna stay and be part of the crowd No I’m not alone now Cause I’ve got something to talk about You shouldn’t stay here These things you really can’t unsee Burning rubber phantoms Lingering just breathe in heavily No comfort in this moment Skip back into a pleasant one For us to be Where we can do anything Rubbernecker’s dream yeah Cars trashed to pieces in the road Don’t you want to see it? Biggest crash since 1981 I don’t want to go home Wanna stay and be part of the crowd But I feel alone now Cause I’ve got nothing to say Guess it’s time to leave again Everywhere I go The people they all look the same I think something is wrong with me And maybe its my fault That everything I see Looks like the start of something close to A missing opportunity A future presently hunting me Everything I know Is fading as the scene dissolves The ambulance has taken them Away and that’s all
12.
Without a Shadow 03:02
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Used to be in a bad routine Stress the day then drink it away Repeat til there’s enough in the bank By that time most memory’s escaped Sweat and shake Til the blood runs pure Breaking off the hooks always hurts Who is gonna love you when your mind is gone? Will it even matter if you can’t make thoughts? Sing for life, identify as esoteric Without a shadow dimming lights instill panic Two weeks in and the pain is gone They must think the new version is flawed Urges come in waves, what the hell for Tell yourself it will be worth it for someone Crash and wake Time slows down in this state Maybe it heals enough for those who can wait Who is gonna love you when your mind is gone? No one lives forever but each moment does Sing for life, identify as esoteric Without a shadow dimming lights instill panic
13.
Circle 748-596-380 02:48
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about

Basket for the first time, wrote songs with vocals sung at the same time.
First time Tommy Tuba wrote songs in which he sang.
Jackpot so LAZY that other members have to sing songs AND mix, AND master EVERYTHING.
Actually this is after a year of lockdown, and all members crazy and not ok with process of rpm at all.
Brennan Frederick too talented to be included in this album (your out, thanks your not welcome anymore for writing/recording a good solo).

credits

released March 1, 2021

Billy Basket - Vocal, guitars, songs, bass, spoken word (deleted), cajon
Thomas Tuba - Zero bass, piano, vocals, guitar drums, sax, barry sax (honk honk), shaker bass drum and sticks (deleted)
Jackpot Calvin - Bass, guitar, CHORD ORGAN, midi drums (deleted), uploaded to bandcamp, setup the zoom chat
B Fred - talent (will not get credit)

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Apraxia Tampa, Florida

Apraxia is a curmudgeon of 2 to 7 people making music for rpm challenge, mostly every February.

Information on our current profile pic: "Een houtsnede van N. de Laaf voor het maandblad 'Het Vliegveld' van december 1924 getiteld 'De Soesterbergsche jazz-band onder den kerstboom.'" is marked with CC0 1.0 ... more

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